Dear Carol,

I have an older cousin who is very blunt with me. I am a sensitive person, and she always ends up hurting my feelings. She has made some comments about the foods I eat and what I read. She also seems angry when she makes her criticisms. How do I talk to her about it?

-Cousin Problem

Dear Cousin Problem,

Why is she so blunt and angry? Happy people aren’t usually mean. Can you try to let her rudeness be her problem, not your problem? You could also say, “I love you, but I feel hurt when you criticize the books I read or the food I eat. I’d rather talk about other things.” If you’re spending time together soon, plan an activity like playing board games or making a craft. Let’s hope she realizes sooner rather than later that being rude is not a great way to treat friends and family.

Carol Weston is the author of 16 books, including Girltalk, Speed of Life and Ava and Pip. Follow her on Insta @carolwestonnyc and visit carolweston.com.

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